The reason why I love the Before Sunrise trilogy is its honest depiction of ‘love’ in all three films. Although I know very little about it–being that my experience on romantic relationships is nothing compared to those who have been married and divorced, I believe that ‘love’, the most pleasant experience of all human emotions, is a full-fledged commitment that should be accepting of all the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Who do I think I am, talking about ‘love’.
I don’t care. I just need to share my thoughts because this is probably the only thing in life that I’m absolutely sure of:
“Although falling in love is easy and is the most beautiful thing in the world, staying in love is the most difficult. It is filled with compromises, understanding and sacrifices. ‘Convenient’ is probably the last word to describe it with.”
Most people my age, including my coworkers who debated over this topic this week, choose to live with their boyfriends/girlfriends before marriage to ‘see’ and ‘know’ the other person better. I have nothing against it, but I don’t see why people find it necessary. I don’t see marriage as something that should serve me convenience. And I don’t think I would judge my potential husband based on his sleeping patterns and Netflix preferences. Or his daily habits and possible annoying kinks.
I would choose to marry someone based on his willingness to commit to the relationship–no matter what.
And this is the reason why I don’t think I’d consider living with the guy first to ‘see’.
When I get there, I should know what I’m in for. And the guy should be on the same page too. And we should be fully aware that it’s not an easy decision with a free “How-To” guide. It’s complicated and we’ll probably kind of hate each other along the way.
But that’s exactly what makes it so beautiful. It doesn’t matter that it’s ugly sometimes, or most times. ‘Love’ outweighs them all. It doesn’t matter that he snores loudly, or he prefers the couch this way, or that he likes purple and you don’t. Or doesn’t believe in most things you believe in.
You pick someone to be a partner in life. Wear your big girl/boy pants on and stick with the decision forever and don’t be a wuss after the little fights. There’s always a bigger picture and you just always have to pick love to win all the time.
between love & hate 